Secrets of Success for Teens: Parents

Parents. We all have them. They can be tough at times. Most of them love us more than we can even comprehend although it hardly seems that way at times. I never had children so I can't truly imagine what it's like to worry about a teen other than the worry I felt as the teacher of teens. I bet parents can still see us as the babies they brought into the world...and they want to protect us at all costs. But it sure doesn't feel that way sometimes...no matter how old you are.

So what to do? When they yell and try to force their way of doing things on us? Well if we still live with them, we've got to honor the fact that they're paying for pretty much everything. We also have to keep in mind that they're probably doing the best they can. After all, no one gives parent lessons.

Here's my take on it as I often shared with the thousands of teens I worked with. Try to see things from your parents point of view. Think how protective you feel about friends, a pet, even a new outfit or car. Imagine if it's actually your child?? Realize that you're supposed to be pulling away from them when you're in your teens. Otherwise you would never be able to leave to start your own life. It's how you pull away that either creates more stress...or less.

Refrain from saying something that will just get you in more trouble. In class, we all breathed when we felt stressed. Breathe in for a count of 5, hold for 20, breathe out for ten. Do it a couple of times and the words we want to say, stay in our heads where maybe they should stay.

I read recently that we all get the parents were were supposed to get. Even the tough ones. They makes us who we're supposed to be. Mine made me search out ways to help people cope with life maybe because I had to at a young age. Guess if I had had the type of parents who gave me everything, then I wouldn't have learned what I learned that led to helping so many teens get their lives in shape. Might not have been there to prevent the couple of suicides that I helped to prevent either.

Things work out the way they're supposed to it seems. While they're working out...we need to make sure we're not looking for reasons to be offended. Don't take it all so personally...it truly does make life easier...with parents...and with ourselves.